That particular night
by CeeDee
Summary: a short followupficlet to 'Lost Purpose'


That particular night  
  


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  It was a week to Christmas. It was two in the morning. It was . . . Ran stood at the window, staring out into the night. Clad only in his pyjama pants, bare feet on soft carpet he watched the snow falling slowly, covering the streets quietly with a slight, white sheet, glittering in the soft glow of the streetlamp. Absently one of his hands leisurely played with the pendant Yohji had given to him on New Year almost three years ago, hanging since then on a small chain from his neck, whilst the other hand was pressed flatly against the cool glass. The pendant, a mate to the one he had given to Yohji, three years ago, on Christmas Eve.

  It was the night as – three years ago – Yohji almost died. The night, Yohji was - due to Ran's stupidity – almost successful about to kill himself. Almost; by a hair's breadth. The night, he nearly lost the one thing, the only person meaning the world to him, the only person he loved more than life, beside his sister. 

  Looking up to the moon, he clearly remembered three years ago, feeling despondent, the despair, the loneliness. The heart wrenching pain. He remembered the emptiness, the forlornness, the sadness, desperate hope. He would never forget. It was the night he was given a second chance. By whatever gods there are - and by Yohji. A lonely tear slowly ran down his cheek as he closed his eyes and stood there, remembering. As he had done on that particular night in the last two years. As he would do in this particular night every coming year. Remember. Not daring to forget.

  He opened his eyes as strong arms closed around his waist, a warm, muscular and bare chest pressed against his back. Soft lips ghosted over his ear before a soft check leaned against his own. They stand there for a long while in silence, watching the dancing snowflakes, the only sound their soft breathing. Eventually, a hand easily slid up his chest to his shoulder, gliding gradually along his upper arm, his forearm, until it rested over his hand, still pressed flat against the glass of the window, fingers entwining with his own. "Come back to bed?" Yohji whispered in his ear.

  Leaning his head back against the warm shoulder behind him, he nodded slowly and shifted his head, temple leaning against Yohji's cheek. "I love you." Yohji remained silent instead responding, guessing his mood too well. Lifting their entwined hands from the window towards his mouth, Yohji simply pressed a lingering kiss in his palm, before he was gently nudged back towards their bed. Slipping between the long past cooled sheets, instantly cradled in Yohji's arms, legs entwined, head resting on the chest of his lover, feeling fingers slowly caressing his back and a kiss being placed on his head. 

"Stop doing that."

"No."

He more felt than heard the sigh, leaving Yohji. "You have to let go of the past."

"I can't. Not tonight." Letting his hand slowly glide over the muscled abdomen, caressing his lover. "I almost lost you. I can't ever forget that. I won't ever forget that."

  They almost never spoke anymore about the events, leading to the suicide attempt. They had done that. In detail. And then they had put it to rest. However, in that particular night, they did. Since the first year. Tomorrow, they would go on with their life, but tonight was like a memorial to Ran. And Yohji accepted that. He don't liked it, but he acknowledged Ran's need. 

  At last, Ran peeked up between his bangs, almost covering his eyes. "I'll never leave you again out of free will, you know?"

"Yeah." Yohji placed a kiss on his forehead. "I know. This isn't an option for me, either." 

"Good." Resting his head back on his lover's chest, murmuring, "nothing's changed in that."

"Nothing's changed in that." Yohji repeated and paused before adding, "I love you."

  It was a ritual, yearly repeated. Like reassuring the life they had together. Oh, not that they not told each other, they had learned from mistakes. But this night was special, like a melancholy ceremony, a secret oath to each other. Nothing else happened on that night, only words softly spoken, holding each other. They were at peace.

  That particular night.

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End


End file.
